time travel

yes, i am extremely excited for christmas.

when i arrived home on tuesday, my family had completely decorated the house for christmas (minus the tree and the outside lights) and had a fire in the fireplace. it was a perfect way to be welcomed home, especially after a ridiculously stressful and draining week. the only odd thing was, thanksgiving still had not happened. i'm not one that gets overly angry when i see christmasy things before the month of december, let alone thanksgiving day, but i for sure thought it was silly. but, seriously, how could i complain when i was surrounded by an abundance of penguins? they bought a light up one especially for me:

nonetheless, this week has proven to be a family overload week. thanksgiving dinner involved my cousin and her new husband, an aunt that i haven't seen in probably 4 years and a surprising lack of other relatives that had never been absent before. i also discussed the upcoming "girl cousins' night" at my aunt's (another one that i haven't seen in years) house, which almost burned down in the recent santa barbara fires. i'm a tad overwhelmed by this upcoming night but it's a month away so whatevs for now. tomorrow i'm going to the zoo with my grandpa and step-grandma, renee, and my mom, dad and sister too. i get to see penguins in person, which easily makes this the best day of my week at home. 

another benefit is the time i have to read.

not only do i get to fit in a few pages of "Travels With Charley" here and there, but my sister has the new NYLON (mine is waiting for me in my SD mailbox). though i was disappointed by the issue's lack of excitement about the new year, i was highly impressed by the holiday playlist created by SNL's newest addition, Casey Wilson. the song descriptions were genius and the humor refreshing. i greatly appreciated the Gremlins reference (and the accompanying picture of a gremlin holding a candy cane with dancing music notes floating above his furry head), as well as the Bruce Springsteen "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" recommendation. Check it out in the Dec/Jan 09 issue with Lily Allen on the cover. it's on page 142. (seriously, it made me LOL.)

a band that i'm getting into: The Welcome Wagon, whose album is produced and arranged by Sufjan Stevens and released on Asthmatic Kitty. very Sufjan-esque, featuring covers of The Smiths and old hymns, as well as original creations. check out the mp3 at stereogum.com. the album is released on Dec. 9.

Woah!

some excitement:

the track thing to the right (you can sample the songs by clicking on the little play buttons)

5 rolls of film developed for $3.21

here are some of my favez:

BOSTON

with the realization that i do NOT miss usd at all while being away for tg break, i delved into the emerson website to reignite an old flame and an old hope. 

i got into emerson with a $16,000 scholarship my senior year of high school. it was my top choice. and my parents wouldn't let me go solely because of the distance. usd seemed like a pretty good option so, because i had a zero percent chance of my parents giving in to my bostonian dreams, i decided to go.

but now i regret giving in (the one time i've ever done so in my life) and truly do not feel that usd is MY school. i know that i am doing some pretty cool things with the paper and my job as a marketing assistant. i know that the school is ranked pretty well (for business), but i just don't feel any strong connection. 

i don't connect well with the people and i don't connect well with the beach party lifestyle. emerson, on the other hand, is my style in every way possible: 

1. big city

2. real weather

3. a million more journalistic opportunities

4. a program designed specifically for magazine production and writing 

5. more serious and genuine media studies students

this school was made specifically for media studies, and the writing/publishing program was made specifically for magazine production. ahem, my life goal is to create my own magazine, and emerson offers a course in which you CREATE YOUR OWN MAGAZINE. ENOUGH SAID.

the people at usd generally suck and i don't think i've had very many real connections. i think my self and my talents would be better appreciated and put to use and allowed to grow in boston. i'm in talks with my parents again. i'm gonna apply and see what kind of scholarship and financial aid i might receive. as unreligious as i am, i will definitely be praying that i am able to transfer to emerson next year. if you know me, that's a pretty big deal. 

shponder

when i woke up today at 12:30 to a wonderful phone call about what drank i would like to have purchased for me tonight, i looked out my window and saw gray skies. not sure what's wrong with me but seeing gray skies made me the happiest i've been all week. i was feeling a bit more healthy after being plagued with a cold for the duration of the week and i decided to treat myself to a day off doing what i do best, watching movies. 

the darjeeling limited has to be one of the best movies to wake up to. vivid colors, an exciting culture, adrien brody and jason schwartzman and natalie portman, a highly enjoyable soundtrack and lots of prescription drug abuse. but what got  me most were the colors. bright colors and sparkly things are like magnets. i'm automatically drawn to them and, if they are buyable, i will buy them. with this film though, wes anderson's style is extremely attractive to me. especially with the indian colors. i could go on and on about colors but they are beyond describable. i wouldn't do them justice.

 

tonight consists of $3 chamapagne and daft punk slow jams. i'm pretty excited. 

the history i'm witnessing

have you ever thought about all of the things we grew up with in the media, and the fact that they're all disappearing before our very eyes? trl has been cancelled, a show that i used to watch every day in middle school. jay leno is retiring, i've been watching that with my dad for years. oprah will soon be retiring too, enough said. and ER, a tv classic that has been on for countless years is in its last season! i'm not huge on tv (i am only dedicated to bravo and the office) but all of these things are a huge part of my generation's development. where would our shitty music taste be without trl's repetitive daily music video countdown? where would my relationship with my parents be without jay leno and oprah? and had there been no ER, would i still be a hypochondriac? this all saddens me a great deal. there are definitely amazing talents in the running to take over jay leno and oprah's respective positons (conan and ellen anybody?), but thanks to all of these wonderful media outlets and personalities, i am who i am today. i will miss all of the above a great deal. maybe not trl so much, but definitely  jay and ER (the cast is very attractive).

vista view

waiting for my ride in The Vista office here on campus, i began to ponder weekend plans which then digressed into life plans. i plan on having a studio apartment next year since half of my friends are graduating and almost the entire other half are studying abroad or having children. living by myself (along with a cat and/or dog) is going to be like living in a heaven, a "kaitlin" heaven. the idea of having my own place with my own kitchen-ware, couch, tv programming, netflix subscription, throw pillows, candles, curtains, rugs, coffee table, decorative disco balls, lucky penguins...the list goes on. i won't have to worry about who did the dishes last, who wants the blinds closed or the heater on. all i will have to worry about is if i'm gonna be done with The Vista in time to catch Chelsea Lately on E! or if i'm running low on method dish soap. please don't get me wrong, i completely love my roommate. but there is something wonderful to be said about quiet time and having your own belongings. while reading "Travels With Charley" by John Steinbeck, i've become envious of the time Steinbeck (and even Charley) have with their own thoughts. when i think about the things i could write if i took a trip with just myself and my dog...i get somewhat overwhelmed, but it's an empowering feeling at the same time? not sure how that works, but it might be that i accept that i CAN be a good writer if i just allow myself the time and mindset. i tend to fight my writing urges because i'm afraid i can't live up to expectations, especially when it's creative writing. i have that brilliant idea for a novel just sitting up on a shelf in my mind, waiting to be put within the front and back covers that make up a book (hard copy of course). we'll seeeee what happens this summer. hopefully i'll have my own place in san diego, accompanied by a job, money, a car and a dog (or cat). those will be the daze. penguin of the week? conductor penguin:

problems

friends dealing with p. safe, friends dealing with bi guys, friends dealing with missing the person they were in the summer and family dealing with fire evacuations. this week has been full of worry for so many people i know. and when the people i care about stress out, i stress out. this week has been very long. and the weather is really hot now. i miss the hope and excitement i felt when the temperature dropped. i'm back to getting iced drinks and wearing flip flops. back to taking the tram everywhere because i can't breathe. (but maybe that's because of smoking rather than the semi-humid weather). and now with these fires threatening the homes of my relatives...things just suck for so many people right now. i'm worried about my aunt and uncle who are trapped in the middle of the fire while housesitting their neighbor's house. i'm worried about...every other person in my family. all of them are dealing with some kind of issue, whether it be health or money or relationships. and then i think about my life and how lucky i am but how stupid i am at the same time. i have my health but i destroy it with cigarettes and being too exhausted to go to the gym. i have my smarts but am destroying them with persistent drug abuse. i have my humor but i'm destroying that by being bitchy. i could go on but i'm destroying my easy-going nature by complaining about things i do to myself. so i have decided to slowly but surely quit smoking and cut back on my bitchiness. i know i'm not the meanest girl ever, especially at usd or in ventura county, but i hate feeling like a bitch. i've been told that i'm a confrontational little one...not exactly how i want to be known, but it's definitely not a bad character trait. i'm proud of my confidence and "strong will." but i'm even more proud of my idea to have a "daft penguin" created for me. ^

ME

with a school year full of election craziness (yaaayyyy obama!), art projects, speeches, latin tests (open-book thank GOD) and weekly issues of The Vista, i rarely ever have time for me. hence why there are never any posts on this supercute blog. i'm pretty sure the main reason i write on it, besides my love of writing, is because of the pink and purple. but last night, on a rare saturday night in, i allowed myself to eat chocolate and read an entire issue of Nylon front to back (the most recent one at that). though i have two past issues sitting on my table under a stack of newspapers and receipts, i was so SO happy to be able to take a (healthy) break from thinking and read about fashion and music. it reminded me why i do everything i do. why i wear the same 4 pieces of crazy jewelry every day, why i write about m.i.a.'s fashion line, why i want to start my own magazine. in the midst of reading i was asked to join a friend in the courtyard to have a cig. that very enjoyable cig break lasted 2 and a half hours and was intermittently freckled with drunken stories from friends arriving home from frat parties and ended with rain sprinkles and gusts of wind, and maybe a raccoon or two, or three. it made me kind of re-fall in in love with usd. i've been contemplating my decision to attend this university, like many of my friends, and i realized that i'm here for a reason, and it's not to appease the many crazy guys i come in contact with, or to talk shit with the cool girls. i'm here because i've already learned so much about myself through so many challenges AND i get to edit The Vista! where else would i have been able to get an editing position that early in my college career? superlucky. 

anyways. the weather in sd is FINALLY cold and there are leaves blowing everywhere and i get to drink hot chocolate with cinnamon and have Campbell's soup at hands on a regular basis (meaning the last 3 days). while i wish there was snow everywhere and i could bundle up with a cutie (whether it be a cat or a guy), i'm happy just typing up a blog post and listening to Beach House (how ironic?).

check out this coolness that my paint created by itself: